måndag, oktober 27, 2008

The "i-m-m"

The first step is to see through these hallucinations called “I”, “me”, “my”. The next step is to become clear about WHAT sees through “I”, “me”, “my” (i-m-m) The fascinating thing is that the very moment the “i-m-m” is seen through the question – WHAT sees through – falls away. Therefore it's a good pointer to say that “i-m-m” is seen through by NO ONE ... or consciousness ... or NO-THING.

Is the “i-m-m” a verbal phenomena bound to what we might call a verbal state of consciousness? I think it is. Couldn't the “i-m-m” be a pure emotional phenomena? Don't we experience “i-m-m” before language is developed? Without going through endless theories by developmental psychologists, I would say, based on my own vague memories, that the “i-m-m” emerged together with language.  That is also confirmed in recent brain, consciousness research

Seeing through the "i-m-m" is the path to the post-verbal state.  

Meditation or mindfulness can be performed in the verbal state. But in that state those acitivities are basically pointless. So the first thing to do, BEFOREE meditation or mindfulness practice, is to move to the post-verbal state. How is that done? 

1. The first step is to go to a place where people are gathered and look at them. It could be a street in the city, a supermarket, a train station. It's easier if it's a place where people don't talk to each other too much. That enables you to “see” the voices in their heads. The inner voices that create the verbal self - moment to moment. In almost every head you see words are produced. Produced by no one. Stories are created. Stories about “me” and “you”. Stories about what this “me” needs from “you”.. And you can see in peoples eyes that they believe these stories. They believe every word of it. And you can see how this belief affects their bodies. A word for this is self contraction. When the verbal “me-story” is believed you can see how the body contracts around this “me-story”.When you see how bizarre this is, you are on the right trackRemember, you are out of love. Don't feel bad if you look at people without love. It's only natural. Remember, in the verbal state, you are out of love. Don't feel bad if you see people as ridiculous ghosts. What you see is ridiculous.

2. The next step is to see your own verbal “me” and to kill the reality of it. It's the suicide of the verbal “me”.

I will come back here and add further instructions on how to perform these two first steps.

3. The third step will be to listen to a dialog between two persons. This is harder than just observing people when they are quiet. Otherwise the process here is the same. We are deeply conditioned to believe in spoken words. Breaking this habit will provoke reactions of fear in your body. What if the other person is saying something that is important for your survival – like, - there is a bomb in the cellar that will explode in twenty seconds, we've better run!!

But you have to be cold and heartless here. You have to remind yourself that if the price of getting out of the verbal state is your life, you are prepared to pay it. And that is actually literally true. We have to kill the “verbal me” in order to access the post verbal state.

3b. In this third step you will experience a state of total alienation. You are no longer part of this world. What other people think is important has no meaning to you. To think like that may feel wrong. See that it actually is wrong – from the viewpoint of someone in the verbal state. But it's the only right thing if you are serious about entering the post verbal state.

3c. This alienated attitude will provoke a state of depression in you. But remember that this depression is something you have to go through. Everything you value, like meaning and hope etc. - are nothing but stories you can no longer believe in. The very “me” that used to value meaning and hope is now seen to be unreal. Not getting depressed when facing these facts is impossible.

4. When the verbal me is dead, you can enter the post-verbal state. What are you going to do in this post-verbal state? That question has no longer any meaning since there is no “me” there who can do things. The “me” is gone. Meditation will become spontaneous. Meditation will be the most natural way to celebrate life. But not the only. You can still participate in life and do things. And everything will become magical. Even the words you hear. If they come from you or someone else will make no difference, words will be one of countless miracles to enjoy.

But sitting in meditation will be the greatest joy of them all. The truest expression of being. At least in the beginning. It will also be the most powerful way to prevent your verbal me from being reborn.

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